Is it normal to cry after sex?

Have you ever cried after sex? It’s completely normal. Well, if you are in the habit of crying after sex, you should consider it to be completely normal.[1]

The reasons for crying after sex may vary from being tears of happiness, relief, or even melancholy. Believe it or not, people who have hidden pain or due to any trauma, start crying after sex.

Crying during or after sex is completely normal and is your body’s biological response.

Crying after sex is referred to as postcoital dysphoria and even postcoital tristesse. However, postcoital tristesse is pretty rare. Some of the most common symptoms of PCD include tearfulness, irritability despite consensual sex and even sadness. However in most cases it can be very satisfying as well.[2]

Is it necessary to experience orgasm?

Postcoital dysphoria is not related to orgasm and can happen with anyone, irrespective of gender as well as sexual orientation.

Very limited research has been done regarding the relationship between orgasm and postcoital dysphoria. Many people over the years have experienced postcoital dysphoria.

One of the 2015 studies has shown that 230 heterosexual females experience postcoital dysphoria. That’s not all. Another study of 2014 showed that 1,208 males experience PCD. Around 4 percent of people experience it.[3]

While some people can cry during sex and others can cry after sex. If you are ever stuck in such a situation, you may want to analyse what the person wants.

Here are some scenarios of why crying after sex is common

Being overwhelmed by the scenario

Were you lost during sex? Have you been fantasizing for a long time? Such cases can often make you confused and will eventually take you on an emotional roller coaster ride.[4]

The sudden transition from fear to ecstasy can be overwhelming, and you will be thrown down to earth.

Tears after sex can often feel like an overwhelming sensation. The thrill of sex can be exciting, yet when you are brought back to reality, it becomes tough for people to process it.

Most couples often find it inconvenient to cry. Well, you may try different situations that can help to bring down the feeling of crying. Lesser fantasizing can be pretty helpful for crying a little less.[5]


Sex can trigger a lot of emotions and feelings. Thus, crying is very common after sex. Well, it’s not uncommon or bad.

We have always been in situations where we have cried the “tears of joy.” It’s the same feeling with sex.

If you are head over heels in love with the person or have had the best sex, then crying is normal.

Also, a lot of individuals tend to cry if they have had sex after a long time. The feeling of having sex after a long time can be pretty intense and will eventually lead you to cry.[6]

Physical response

It is completely your body’s response and natural. Most people cry after sex due to hormonal changes.

If you have had a great orgasm or multiple ones, you can cry eventually. Intense sexual pleasure can be overwhelming. So, if you have had any such experiences, you wouldn’t be having any problem.[7]

The lack of physical response too, can be overwhelming and make your feelings intense. So, crying is normal and not something too much.

Also, sometimes it may happen that you may not get the desired level of sex. Hence, if you do not get a good climax to your sex, you can become frustrated.

Apart from feelings of happiness, the feelings of frustration will make you tense and hence, crying is normal.[8]


Painful sex is common. A lot of women have often complained about pain during sex.

Painful sex is also referred to as dyspareunia, which may be caused for different reasons like

If you have any physical condition and experiencing pain during sex, the condition can be treated. It is necessary to get in touch with a doctor as soon as you can to enhance the overall impact.[9]

Sex can be uncomfortable for many, so, if you have been experiencing it, you can talk to your partner about it. Role-play can boost the impact thereby reducing physical pain. You both need to come to a mutual understanding so that it works fine for both of you.


Anxiety is a common response to crying. Crying is a natural process that can be caused due to fear, stress and even anxiety.

If you have been feeling guilty about something, it is natural not to be able to keep it aside during sex.

Even when you’re having sex, sometimes the situations can be distracting, so you cannot be focused. While your body is in motion, your mind can be somewhere else. Hence, sometimes it becomes impossible to control your tears.[10]

Are you crying because you have been feeling performance anxiety? Sometimes you may feel that you cannot perform well or match your partner’s required expectations.

All this anxiety that had been building up within you will eventually lead to crying out tears. And honestly, if you have been crying due to anxiety, there’s absolutely no way to stop these tears.

Shame or guilt

Shame or guilt is a very common reason for crying after sex.

Someone, over the years, must have told you that sex is bad. This can usually depend on different situations. If you have submitted to these theories, it is time that you take them out of your head and indulge in other activities.[11]

Sometimes sex can be uncomfortable. You must have seen people indulging in kinky sex, animal behavior, and lack of impulse control. Also, a lot of people feel guilty due to body image issues. The shame of yourself being seen naked can be pretty overwhelming.

Shame and guilt can reside in a relationship. Guilt may mostly exist because if you have cheated. The guilt and shame in your relationship will walk with you in the bedroom. That’s where it all grows and causes most of the problems.[12]


Have you been feeling confused in a relationship? Do you or do you not want to indulge in sex?

Did you feel that you haven’t satisfied your partner ever? Sometimes, emotional confusion and unresolved issues can be pretty confusing. The ideas of relationships are different for different people. How you feel about yourself will also have an impact on your relationship.[13]

If the sex doesn’t turn out great, it is natural to be confused and disappointed.


[2] Bird B, Schweitzer R, Strassberg D. The prevalence and correlates of postcoital dysphoria in women. Sex Health 2011;23:14–25. [Google Scholar]

[3] Basson R. A model of women’s sexual arousal. J Sex Marital Ther 2002;28:1–10. [PubMed] [Google Scholar]

[4] Hatfield E, Rapson RL. Love, sex, and intimacy: Their psychology, biology, and history. New York: Harper Collins; 1993. [Google Scholar]



[7] Regan PC, Berscheid E. Beliefs about the state, goals, and objects of sexual desire. J Sex Marital Ther 1996;22:110–120. [PubMed] [Google Scholar]


[9] Tiefer L. Historical, scientific, clinical, and feminist criticisms of the human sexual response cycle model. Annu Rev Sex Res 1991;2:1–23. [Google Scholar]


[11] Burri AV, Schweitzer RD, Obrien J. Correlates of female sexual functioning: Adult attachment and differentiation of self. J Sex Med 2014;11:2188–2195. [PubMed] [Google Scholar]


[13] Shaver PR, Hazan C. A biased overview of the study of love. J Soc Pers Relat 1988;5:473–501. [Google Scholar]